Daily Tips from a Real (Fake) Doctor

Face it, your health is important– and it starts in your head. Ever lured a squirrel onto your front stoop, fed it peanut butter and then forced it to be your pet? No? Well, that’s probably why you’re depressed enough to be reading this. Do it. Rabies isn’t real.

Dear Diary: I’m Not Normal.

This is going to give some of you jerks the wrong idea, but I fucking love boners. They’re awesome.   I don’t know why women get offended when a guy is aroused by them. I mean, if he’s clearly imagining creepy shit and looks like the bad guy from The Smurfs, sure, but a regular ol’…

Dear Diary: I’m A Weird Lady-Child.

I haven’t smoked pot in a while. I like it, but sometimes when I’m high I worry that I’m not making any sense .   I hear myself laughing like some kind of shrill,  giant chicken,  and silently plead,  “Please no-one notice that I’m a fucking idiot”.  I have adhd…so, I kind of already think as though I’m stoned…

Dear Diary: Excerpts from the ramblings of a friggin’ idiot (me).

Life. One day I’ll figure it out. I say that as if I’m totally in control.  I mean, in one tiny corner of my brain, I’m a fucking genius.  And the other thousand percent of my brain resembles something like Chuck E Cheese on a Saturday.  Fucking sweaty kids with cheese hanging out of their…

“Sparkle” Ad Spoof : Sketch Comedy by AM Jackson

“SPARKLE” LAUNDRY DETERGENT AD SPOOF , A comedic Sketch INT,A MODERN HOME, DAY Sharon, a disheveled housewife, trudges through her home carrying a load of dirty laundry. As she walks, her children, Sarah and Billy, and her husband Robert rush past her, throwing their dirty laundry at the pile, overwhelming her. Billy, Sarah and Robert…

Dear Other Human: Fake Letters, pt 1

12/1/2016 Dear Other Human, Monkey, Robot, or Exceptionally intelligent Mouse,   This is my personal stationary.  I made it because I feel self- important, and I like to see the letters of my name looking very fancy and official in ink.  “AM” Jackson.  It’s got a ring to it.  It makes me sound as though…

Dear Diary: Excerpts from the private journal of a weird single lady(Me).

You can’t predict what I’m going to watch, Netflix. Stop trying so hard. Yeah, I watched “She Devil”, starring Roseanne Barr. What of it? I’m probably gonna try and watch a Carebears movie while high sometime in the near future too. What’s that? You’ve got “suggestions” for me? Alright, let’s see. . . Frasier?  Fucking…

A Broken Wing

You saw beacons in people, made prophets of coins, You smelled failure on your frigid breath as burden sucked you dry. But you shed tears in the open street, defied the weight of cold concrete, Spread your wings and let them see: Broken sparrows still know how to fly.

Your Wedding Checklist: Do it Right.

Congratulations! You’re getting married!  Now it’s time to go fucking crazy.  Your Wedding Checklist 9 to 12 months prior to wedding day: ☐  Introduce your terrible relatives to one another at a nice little Barbeque. ☐  Pump fringe relatives for cash, using guilt and tradition as your weapons. ☐  Discuss budget with your fiance, get…

Your New Neighbors

      Dec 4, 2016 Dear Residents, You may have noticed some changes around the property. Due to the colder weather, we have experienced a sharp increase in the rat population here at Oak Grove Condominiums. Please observe curfew hours between 9 pm and 11 am to avoid confrontation with the violent breed of…

Christmas Cliche

  Christmas Cliche by anne-marie-jackson featuring red home decor Red home decor target.com Amazon.com: Four Christmases: Reese Witherspoon, Vince Vaughn, Seth… amazon.com Disaronno Amaretto Liqueur Miniature $2.34 – justminiatures.co.uk

For the Delicate Kind

For The Delicate Kind Advice for the kind-hearted It’s something you can’t talk about with most people… but when you’re significantly more emotionally intelligent than the people around you, and cursed with the gift of exceptional empathy, ironically, it’s difficult to truly connect with anyone. It doesn’t start that way. At first you’re wide eyed and open…

Me Thoughts. By Me.

  Untitled #711 by anne-marie-jackson featuring Lékué Lékué surlatable.com