“Sparkle” Ad Spoof : Sketch Comedy by AM Jackson

“SPARKLE” LAUNDRY DETERGENT

AD SPOOF , A comedic Sketch

INT,A MODERN HOME, DAY

Sharon, a disheveled housewife, trudges through her home
carrying a load of dirty laundry. As she walks, her children,
Sarah and Billy, and her husband Robert rush past her,
throwing their dirty laundry at the pile, overwhelming her.

Billy, Sarah and Robert exit hurriedly.

SHARON
(discouraged) Bye! Have. . . a-

(they have already gone) good day.

Exasperated, Sharon drops the pile of laundry and blows her
tangled hair out of her face, sighing heavily and looking at
the camera.

There is a knock at the door.

Sharon opens the door to reveal her friend Kathy, who is
dressed sharply and smiling excitedly. Kathy enters.

SHARON
Wow. You look amazing. How you do
it with three kids, I’ll never
know.

Kathy winks and pulls a fancy bottle labeled “Sparkle” out of
her bag. She gestures with it as she speaks.

KATHY
I think it’s high time I let YOU in
on my little secret!

SHARON
(dubious) Wine coolers? I wish I
could, Kath, but look at this
mountain of laundry! I wish I had
YOUR life.

Kathy looks at the camera knowingly.

A voice-over begins to speak as Kathy takes Sharon by the
arm, leading her to the laundry room.

VOICE-OVER
Has life lost it’s luster?

INT, SHARON’S LAUNDRY ROOM, A FEW MOMENTS LATER

Kathy and Sharon stand in the laundry room. Sharon nods,
sobbing.

SHARON
Rob almost checked me into a looney
bin. All I do is clean– I’m so
frickin’ depressed, I can’t even be
(whispering) intimate with my
husband! And the kids. . .

(she mimes choking a person).

Kathy pats Sharon on the back, pours a cap full of sparkle
into the wash, turns it on, and then pours another cap full
and hands it to Sharon, gesturing for her to drink it.

SHARON
(suspicious but chipper)But I
thought this was laundry detergent!

Kathy smiles knowingly at the camera again.

KATHY
Just trust me.

Sharon nervously takes a drink.

A sparkle-burst effect graphic appears on the screen around
Sharon.

Sharon, transformed, looks at Kathy, wide-eyed and blissful.

SHARON
You weren’t kidding! What is this
stuff?? And what about the laundry?

Kathy winks and pulls out a fresh load of towels, breathing
in deeply.

Sharon rubs her face and body against the towels like a cat
in heat, her eyes rolling back in her head. She behaves as if
she has taken a mighty dose of the drug Ecstasy.

SHARON
That was fast! How’d you do that?

A text graphic appears on the screen that reads:

Actual wash time varies.

SHARON
(re:towels) They’re sooo soft! I
LOVE towels. I love you. You’re
such a gooood friend!

Sharon strokes Kathy’s hair affectionately.

Kathy smiles.

KATHY
Smell that? That’s the “Sparkle
Effect”. It’s working! Now let’s
get this job done!

WHITE SCREEN, COLORFUL INFO-GRAPHIC APPEARS.

A diagram of the interior of the human body illustrates how
sparkle works when inhaled or ingested as a voice over
speaks.

A blue trail of glitter enters through the nose, then mouth,
and as it travels through various canals, it “dances”,
finally reaching the brain. Different areas of the brain
light up.

VOICE OVER
It’s more than a laundry detergent.
It’s SPARKLE. Sparkle’s unique
mood-boosting ingredients work
over-time, keeping your clothes
fresh and your days bright! For a
“Sparkle” your whole family will
notice!

INT, SHARON’S HOUSE, LATER THAT NIGHT

Loud electronic music plays and only the light of a pulsing
strobe illuminates the living room as Billy and Sarah dance
around with glow sticks, periodically stopping to deeply
inhale the sparkle scent from their shirts.

Nearby on the couch, Robert and Sharon kiss and rub up
against each other wildly, taking turns sniffing and rubbing
a bath towel.

VOICE-OVER
Isn’t it time you got your Sparkle
back?

Text graphic appears on screen:

WARNING:

Do not use Sparkle while driving or operating heavy
machinery. When used improperly, Sparkle may be habit
forming.

Side effects may include:

Dehydration

A sense of Euphoria

The belief in magic and/or a Unicorn deity

A feeling of invisibility

Acute night blindness in dogs and mice

hyperactivity

increased sensations

the urge to steal

A child-like wonder

and headache.

INT, THE KITCHEN, MORNING

Sharon stands at the back door as the children and Robert
leave for the day.

ROBERT
Last night was something else,
sugarplum. Who knew you were such a
great dancer??

He kisses her sweetly and exits.

SARAH/BILLY(IN UNISON)

We love you mommy!

They hug Sharon enthusiastically before running out the door.

Sharon closes the door and smiles as she takes a small bottle
of Sparkle out of her apron pocket. She unscrews the cap and
inhales, then looks around before running to the laundry
room, where the washing machine is rocking violently in
full-spin mode.

Sharon looks at the camera, raises an eyebrow, and shuts the
laundry room door behind her.

Moans are heard.

A close-up of the Sparkle bottle and logo.

VOICE OVER
Add a drop of Sparkle to YOUR life!

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